New blog address!

My life is in a period of changes at the moment. It sort of feels like a new start. A new life. That's why I decided to do the same with my blog. I've made a new blog. It's new and much improved. The address is almost the same, only with one tiny addition - my letter, s, at the end. Please check it out:

Click HERE to visit my new blog, audunsdottirs.blogspot.com.

Kon-Tiki

If you haven't seen this film, do it now. Don't let it go past you. It's great. It's wonderful and amazing. It's so incredibly inspiring and makes you want to make your life an adventure. Which it should be. Although I would personally like my adventure not to involve sharks and big wide ocean.

Purple

In earlier years feminism used to look like this. Women had to fight for the right to vote, the right to get education and have the same opportunities as men. They had to fight against being owned by they're husbands. Today, the majority of world's countries have gained these basic human rights. And it's great. It's lovely and wonderful. Women can have jobs and get paid. They can wear jeans and drive cars. Of course it isn't this perfect all over the world. We still need to work on this. I'm doing a so called "gender studies" course at school, which mainly consists of arguing about the equality of men and women. I've always been aware of the importance of equal rights and had a pretty clear idea of my stand in all this. But it wasn't that big of a deal to me. Now, since I started this course it's been on my mind almost constantly. I've started noticing things that I didn't notice before. I feel that I have so much to say. The world hasn't been in such a good state for long so we still have a few cavemen around. Both male and female. People still get treated differently depending on gender. The other day we were talking about children and how society divides them into boys and girls. I don't like it. I think the main aim today is to get rid of those gender stereotypes. I think that's what the next step of feminism is about. Or should be about. It's about fighting for everyone's rights to do whatever they want. Men's as well as women's. Women don't need to burn their bras. They shouldn't have bought them in the first place if they don't want to wear them. Because they can be without them.

I'm the only girl out of three siblings. Which means the other two, my brothers, are males. We are similar in some ways because we are related. We also look similar because we're all human. We've all got two arms and two legs, one nose, ten toes, lungs and blood and guts. But we are also different from each other in multiple ways because of our genders. For most normally functioning people it won't take long to realize that we are of two different genders. I have boobs. They don't. Their voice is darker than mine and they have a lot more facial hair. They are severely taller and more masculine than me. They produce a lot more testosterone than me. And they can't have babies inside them for nine months. It also shouldn't be too hard to notice a difference between all three of us because we are individuals. My older brother is slim and has very dark hair. My younger brother's got the biggest hands and feet ever. I'm the only one with glasses. My older brother loves football. My younger brother prefers basketball. I just don't prefer sports to anything else, ever.

I was quite a "girly-girl" when I was younger. I liked looking nice and wanted to be a princess. I liked my Barbie-dolls. I liked drawing and writing stories. But I also had a blue tractor and a hammer like my dad. I loved pirates. My favorite color was definitely not pink. My younger brother on the other hand liked pink at one point. And my older brother had a doll as a baby. My little baby brother also liked cars and the older one loved his legos more than anything. I can't see anything wrong with us today. We aren't any different from other people. I don't want to say that we were normal, because what is normal and what's not? We are just our own individual selves. If anything, our freedom to choose our own paths has made us happier and more open to new things than we otherwise would have been.

I think it's ridiculous to try to prove that men and women are exactly the same. We're not. I admit that I chose social studies at school rather than biology and all that stuff. So I'm not going to play all smart and pretend I know anything about the human body. But I did learn about the birds and the bees. And I know the genders have different types of chromosomes in them. There's no way that those differences don't have anything to say. We are divided into men and women. But what's maybe more important is the fact that we are all human. Some men are tiny while some women are masculine. Men can be sensitive just like women can. Women are good drivers just like men. We are individuals and there is a reason for why we should have equal rights and the same opportunities. There's no real way to tell if the differences between the genders exist mainly because of biological features or because of society. The only thing that's sure to me is that there's no reason to underline those differences. If girls want to wear pink clothes and play with dolls and become princesses and stay-home mothers when they grow up, it's fine. In fact it's wonderful. If boys choose to dress in blue and become truck drivers and spacemen, they should definitely do that. Just like girls who want to be truck drivers and boys who want to wear pink can do that too. There shouldn't be sertain "girl-things" and "boy-things". Everything should just be in one big pile of stuff and then we can all choose what we like the most. Of course, no one is saying that people aren't allowed to choose what they like, but it's hard to follow that when everything is divided into groups that are obviously meant for a specific gender. Grown-ups should be strong enough to not let that control them. But children are much more fragile and they just follow what they see around them. This might not matter a lot to many people, but it does affect some people in a bad way. And it shouldn't be like that. If our society wouldn't divide everything into gender groups but have it all together in a gender-neutral group - yet, the boys would still choose the blue stuff and the girls would choose the pink stuff, then it would be alright. Maybe we are just that different in reality. But we can't know the truth unless things change.   

I am a woman. I'm sensitive and fragile at times. I'm romantic. But I'm not dramatic and I don't scream when I watch a horror movie. I own more music by Metallica than Britney Spears. I'm not very strong and therefore maybe not fit for very physical work. But I don't mind getting my hands dirty. I love working in mud and paint. I'm interested in clothes and like to look nice. I love wearing dresses and tights. I even wear up to three tights at the same time when it's cold. I like high heels. They're fun...when you can walk in them. I've got a few pairs of amazing high heels that I use when I know I won't be walking too much. On the other hand I have no sense for make-up and hardly ever bother to put it on. I feel better when my hair looks nice but without having to put in too much work and effort. I love coloring my hair and trying out new things. I've had everything from pretty long hair to very short and "boyish" hair. When I was sixteen I probably had more guy friends than girl friends. I still don't like pink. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up, but I'm excited about choosing whatever I want.

I was in a toystore once. A little girl was looking at halloween costumes with her mother. She pointed at a superhero costume and said: "I want this costume". Her mum said: "No, don't you rather want to be something prettier. Like a princess?". - Am I the only one who thinks the mother was wrong by saying that? Of course, parents want to watch out for their children, and sometimes that means helping them to blend in with the rest of the group. But if everyone does this, things won't change. And that girl obviously didn't want to be a princess. So things have to change in order for her to be able to be who she wants to be.

Even though I say this it doesn't mean I want men and women to be exactly the same. I know we aren't. I even think that makes life and the relationship between males and females a little bit more exciting. I don't want that to change. I like feeling "feminine" in terms of feeling sexy and comfortable with myself. I just don't want to feel like I need to be a sertain way to be appealing to and accepted by other people. That's why I know I'm a feminist.
You don't have to put on a red lipstick. But if you want to you definitely should. Because you can.

    

A new year, a new beginning, new adventures

Ears hurt as if they're exploding. Eyes are burning. Lungs are filled with smoke. Fingers frozen. Toes and noses are numb. Hearts skip a beat in excitement. It's New Years Eve. Loud noises sound like music. Bright lights shot up into the air and deviding into a thousand little stars. Smoke which smells so good that you can't resist breathing deep down to the bottom of your lungs. Cold bodies that make us take a step closer to each other, touch warm bodies underneath layers of clothes with swollen hands and dance with our toes to see if they're still on our feet. Hearts are boiling with happiness and love for others as well as ourselves as we watch old memories get blown up far above us. The only things we are left with are dreams of new adventures and hopes of the best year of our lives being just around the corner. Just behind the smoke from the bonfire. With sweet taste of cheap champagne on the tip of our tongue and our bellies filled with food we go out to the night, wishing to stay awake in this moment forever.

It's New Years Eve and anything could happen.   

 

New Years in Iceland is magical. It's impossible not to feel it when standing outside in the dark, cold night among elves and fairies and ghosts from the past hiding in every corner around you. Maybe that's just the bubble talking, but it doesn't matter. It's just about feeling and enjoying the moment. For me this night is holy. Although I'm starting to realize that the fact that a new year has knocked on your door doesn't really change a thing, the world hasn't turned upside down and you're still left with the same worries, wonderings and all that, you're friends and family are still there and your home has stayed the same, I'm still left with a feeling of relief every time. It's the perfect time to change the things that need to change, to turn some tables. It's a time to look back on both the good times and the bad times, think about what you want out of your life (or at least this upcoming year) and make plans in order to get closer to what you want. I always make new years resolutions. Every single year. I write them on a piece of paper and tape them to a rakette. It makes them more real to see them explode high up in the sky and imagine that them spreading all over the world. It's like letting the universe know that you will manage to keep your resolutions. They don't have to be anything revolutionary. Just something that you want to fullfill and will make proud of yourself. Because you should be so, so proud of yourself.    

 

 

This past year has mainly been good. For some reason though, itbeen one of the mentally most exhausting years of mine. It has had its ups and downs, but mainly been fantastic. I had many great axperiences. I went to five countries within a week - Sweden, Finland, Russia, Estonia and Norway. I also went to France. We had many big celebrations in the family. I gained two beautiful baby girls into my life. Sadly, they're not mine. I got a new piercing. I moved to the dorm at my school and got a lovely roommate whom I get along with splendidly. I've spent some memorable evenings with many amazing people.

 

This year will involve even bigger and better adventures. I turn 20 in less than two months. I'll be able to buy my own alcohol and get into pretty much all clubs and bars I'd possibly wish to go to.

I graduate from school. Although I've liked the school, I love my friends and wish I could live in my childhood home forever and never had to miss my family, I can't help that I sometimes feel like my cheeks could explode and I'm going to throw up butterflies in excitement that I can finally see the end of this period in my life and start planning the future somewhere else in the world. I know where I'm heading. I've known since I was about 12. I realized it in ninth grade. I've spent hours figuring out what path to take to get there, and it's all getting clearer now. It gets clearer everyday. Final decisions might even be made within this week. I can litterally feel the butterflies in my mouth as we speak. This year is my most exciting year so far. Sometimes I want to crawl under my bed and sleep forever because of it. But most of the time I want to just ditch everything and start my journey right now.

 

 

At the start of this school year a classmate of mine said: "Only 8 months to go, then life begins." I thought it sounded strange. But in a way, it's true. Until now life has mainly been preparation for what's yet to come. This year I'll finally get to see life in the real world, and have the chance to use what I've learned. And of course learn a lot more. It's exciting.

I decided to delete most of my previous blog posts. Only the ones that I remember spending a great deal of time and energy to write and the ones with my best photographs got to stay. A great amount of my old posts were simply strange and irritating. While reading through them (quickly) I felt like the butterflies in my mouth were slowly dying a painful death or even worse - turning back into gruds - and would definitely not have come out flying in a jolly, colorful fairytale-y way like you'd wish it did.

 

I wish everyone a happy new year.

 

Pictures: private.



Paris: miscellaneous